Original post : February 5, 2014
It's a process.
Nicki has made huge strides since she came to live with us. There are
still monsters in her closet, though, and every now and then, they reach
out to try to grab her. I call her my PTSD dog, and that's not an
The other day, Nicki was sitting at the top of
the stairs. My hubby came up the stairs part way, lowered himself to lay
on the stairs so his head would be at Nicki's
level, and attempted to give her a gentle greeting. Then the bogeyman
bit her. We have no idea why, but she suddenly leaped up, spun around,
lay back down, cowered, and cried the entire time. In the process, she
banged my hubby's forehead with her teeth, leaving a little mark that
bled slightly. It absolutely was not a bite.
So what was all
that? What set her off? What frightened her so? She saw her Dad coming
up the stairs, laying near her, reaching out. None of it was a surprise.
And yet, she was clearly terrified of something. The crying and whining
were proof of that. What past shadow so overtook a moment of affection?
So we keep trying to reassure her. The shadows will stay in the past.
There's nothing here but love and tenderness. It's ok to stop being
It's only been 5 months. After who knows how long she
endured rejection, neglect, and apparently outright abuse - 5 months is
the wink of an eye.