Toy Story

 Happy Independence Day!!

We're spending the day distracting ourselves with toys and cuddles. Booms can be so unnerving! "Toys?!" you say? Yup - toys!

By now you've probably seen the video of Nicki finally playing with a toy. If not, here's where you can find it. If you love rescued animals - it'll make your day.

I was initially still hesitant to think that this new joy would carry over to other toys. I had shown Nicki squeaky toys before while shopping at pet supply stores. Her reaction was odd. She seemed almost afraid of the squeakers. She would look at me uncertainly while sort of ducking her head and turning away. Because of that, I figured she didn't care for that type of toy. When my daughter broke down that wall with a squeaky Easter Bunny, I dared to hope that her love of play might just have been temporarily thwarted by the abuse and neglect she had endured. I started buying toys. Lots of toys. I soon learned that her preference is squeaky toys that are furry but don't have tons of robust stuffing. She wants to get that squeaker quickly. This has resulted in the untimely demise of a good number of fuzzy squeaky toys.

Recently, my friend Holly suggested an outing to Runnings with Nicki, me, and her rescued Border Collie, Rue. Rue was one of the Sprakers Border Collies. Google that if you can stand some heartbreak. She was virtually feral when Holly got her. Rue has made so much progress it's just heartwarming! Holly's great with her dogs. All ten of 'em! She's also our groomer and pet sitter! And general guardian angel. She thought (and I agreed) that taking Nicki and Rue into a pet-friendly store during less-busy hours would help both dogs with socialization and being at ease with unfamiliar surroundings. Nicki's mastered this already. Stores mean treats, so she loves everyone in stores! If not treats, stores at least mean lots of people who love dogs. Zero down side here! Hopefully, Nicki's example helped Rue to see that the unfamiliar was no longer something she need fear. It's not a done deal. But Rue was much more comfortable with the idea as the adventure progressed.

At one point, we headed down the pet toy aisle. I saw a likely candidate for Nicki, based on the preferences she had recently shown. I picked out a toy and squeaked it for her, then dandled it above her head. No shirking away! She leapt for the toy! She grabbed it and began playing with it! Right there in the store! I was amazed again! She dropped it and turned away, so I picked it up and put it back on the hook, which was just above floor-level. Nicki saw me take away "her" toy, went over to the hook, grabbed the toy and gently pulled it down from the wall. She didn't disturb anything else, she simply went and got her toy. She then proceeded to carry it around the store!

Of course, I bought the toy and we brought it home. When she stayed with Aunt Holly recently, she came home with the same toy in a different colour scheme!! Aunt Holly loves to spoil this girl! She now has two favourites!! But I'll be ordering bags of replacement squeakers in bulk soon.....and I'll be overjoyed to do it!

The "Pig In A Poke" Factor

It's real. Even I avoided the idea of shelters and rescue when it came time to bring a fur friend into the family, ostensibly for my daughter. I had researched breeds, I knew our family. I believed I had a good fit in mind. I was right. We wanted a Border Collie.

What I didn't know was that there were breed-specific rescues in existence! Knowing what I know now, though, I realize that they would never have allowed me to adopt. Even an animal behaviorist from a local, well-respected and widely known shelter had been refused by Border Collie rescues. Of course they had their reasons, but I have to wonder; when you've rejected more potential adopters than you've accepted, who are you really helping? Especially when a number of those dogs remain unadopted for many months - even years. I know it happens that way. After we adopted Nicki from New Spirit for Aussie Rescue, I checked back at the Border Collie rescues where I had fallen in love with numerous dogs - all of whom were denied to me. I wanted those dogs to go to good homes, even if it couldn't be my home. But there they sat. It broke my heart.

But I digress.

The "pig-in-a-poke" factor kept me from looking at rescues and shelters for our first family dog. I wanted to be "sure" of "what we were getting" - not from a pedigree stance, but from a temperament, intelligence, friendliness, etc. stance. Then one day my young daughter asked me, while lovingly playing with her red BC puppy, "Momma, how do we know she'll be a nice, friendly dog?" And I answered her "Because we'll raise her that way." And I taught both of us a lesson in that moment. Our Daisy had the kindest, sweetest, wouldn't-hurt-a-fly temperament. She was super smart. She was obedient. She was amazingly loving. She was everything we wanted in a dog. Not because we bought her that way, but because we raised her that way. Or perhaps because the way in which we raised her allowed that beautiful, gentle nature to come through in full glory.

Adopting a rescue dog, unless you adopt a puppy - and you can adopt puppies (even pure breds) from rescue - is a different story. You're not raising a dog. One is coming to you with issues from their past. But just the way you overcome the issues of puppyhood, with patience, consistency, and love, you can also overcome a rescue pup's issues. Or at least make them manageable for all of you. Rex might always chew shoes, whether you raise him from a pup or adopt him as an old man. Sometimes Rex is just gonna chew that shoe.

My point being, this blog exists to try to help dispel that "pig-in-a-poke" factor. Dogs are like a box of chocolates .....  You really don't ever know what you're gonna get. It doesn't matter where they begin. What matters is how they end up. A good, loving home makes all the difference.
Don't be afraid to encourage a friend to at least consider rescue and adoption. Point them here if they want to know what they'll get when they take a rescue dog home - but tell them I also said that I realize we got lucky. Nicki clearly hasn't always lived as a refugee. She doesn't have as much damage as some rescue pups do, but hers does still show from time to time. Just the other day she veered wide away from a man out walking, although she'd walked close by his young daughter just one moment before. Nicki has man problems. (Don't we all?) The b@$ta@rd that left her tied to his fence and then moved away was the one she was saved from, but he didn't have her for her entire life. She's too much of a Southern Belle for that. A Southern Belle again, still amidst the magnolias.

An Easter Miracle

If you've been following Nicki's story, you know a sad truth about chained dogs: they often don't play. Nicki had been chained to a fence for who knows how long, and nobody knows what age that began. When she came to live with us, it became apparent very quickly that she didn't know how to play. Even if I made play bows, she didn't seem to have any idea. Toys were a mystery to her. Her rescuers had told me the same thing. She just didn't play. Having loved every Frisbee and ball-throwing minute of my Border Collie's long life, suddenly having a buddy who didn't get it was deeply disappointing. I tried to teach Nicki to catch a soft ball. She didn't see the point. I tossed Frisbees around the house. She sat by and watched. I played "chase" with soft toys, scooting them over her paws with my hand, trying to awaken her prey drive and channel it into some fun. Nope.

Nicki (and I) are blessed to have some really awesome people in our lives. One of them is Nicki's favourite person in the world. No - it's not me. I've learned to accept that. Nicki loves me, but she loves her big sister (my daughter) more. Nicki's big Sis doesn't even live with us, but the bond between them has always been very strong. Big Sis, in turn, loves Nicki, too. So much so that she made an Easter basket for Nicki! There were lots of little treats and goodies - and a toy. Nicki was having so much fun enjoying big Sister's visit that it didn't occur to me to take the toy out of the basket.

Once everyone went home and the house was quiet again, I noticed the "chocolate" bunny and took it out of the wrapper. Nicki paid attention to it immediately! She didn't take her eyes off of it. Then I tossed it to her - and was completely amazed. She grabbed it, chomped onto it a bit, shook it a bit, got it to squeak, dropped it and took a step back in surprise - then pounced on it!! She picked it up and shook it! She tossed it into the air, then pounced on it again! She was playing!!! We had never seen that before! Her Dad was so excited that he ran to grab the camera, and we did what all proud parents do: we took a video. Here it is. This is our Nicki, finally actually playing. Happy Easter!!

There's a really happy update to this story!! You can read it here!!

The Princess Diaries

We've been pretty much house-bound for the past few months. Between deep snows, bitter cold and some health issues for me, a good walk outside has not been an option.

But Nicki is unfazed.

She seems perfectly happy to be a fluffy couch potato, endlessly soaking up petties and affection. A little TOO happy maybe! I can't feel her ribs - so that probably means all these treats and inactivity are taking their toll on her girlish figure! Well, the weather seems to be breaking somewhat, and I've been able to get out for a short walk several times this week. Nicki is so happy!!! OUTSIDE! It's the best!

A friend came to visit last week. She did some reflexology on me to help me heal. It was wonderful! But apparently, it was stressful for Nicki. My friend, who is a lovely human being but not a pet person, was completely taken aback by Nicki's foot-chewing. Like many dogs, Nicki cleans her paws by licking them and nibbling between her pads. Like many herding dogs, she can be a bit over zealous about it. And like many rescued dogs, she can sometimes use this behavior as a stress reducer.

I didn't want to get into a big explanation about it, so I just explained to my friend that it was like people who bite their nails; a nervous habit. Actually, it's exactly like that, and I know first hand. You can usually tell how stressed I've been by the condition of my cuticles. Apparently, my friend's placement on a foot stool before me, my refusal to allow Nicki into my lap during this, and the friend actually touching me for a prolonged time made Nicki very uneasy. She may have felt that her place with me was threatened. She may have simply been confused. After all, people don't drop by to massage my feet very often! For whatever reason, though, this visit and act of kindness were stressful for Nicki.

That's why it's good to be Princess. When you're Princess, nobody just leaves you to your own devices, then yells at you for getting it wrong. When you're the Princess, people react to you in predictable ways. They reassure you and comfort you if something is upsetting. Or they mark the borders of the situation for you so you know what to do. When you're Princess, dinner time is guaranteed and so is that very comfy bed.

Nicki is a Princess. She has to be. I'm pretty sure she's also a large part of the reason for the improvement in my cuticles........

Single Digits ?!?!? Cabin fever!

It's cold. Really, really really cold. So cold that Nicki gets perilously close to getting frostbitten paws when she's out to do her business. I've tried putting her boots on, but she seems to be in rebellion this year. Maybe they're just too stiff in this overwhelming cold. For whatever reason, the poor girl often does what she's gotta do while trying to hold at least one paw up during the process. Quite the achievement, I must say!

We're also bored off our gourds. I haven't been up to snuff lately, and I admit to being a Cold Weather Wuss at any rate. A walk in temps well below freezing is never going to be my idea of fun! Nicki would be willing, but I'd wind up carrying her home after a half block! I know this because we did it last year. It was that experience, repeated a few times, that drove me to try to get boots for her. Since commercially made boots didn't fit, I played around with making a pair. That went pretty well! She liked them enough that they wore out! We need to experiment with other materials this year....

But in the meantime, we have some serious cabin fever and limited outlets for healthy puppy play. Nicki doesn't play with toys, unless they contain food. Obviously I can't give her food toys constantly, so I've been trying to come up with other activities. Some days we drive to Petco or PetSmart just to be able to walk around! I buy something, of course, but I walk Nicki up and around every aisle in the store! She gets to smell different things, get out of the house, and get a little physical exercise.

Just as Nicki never learned to play with toys, she also doesn't really know how to play with people - or other dogs. This poor girl must have had a lonely puppyhood...   I do try to run around the house with her, but she clearly doesn't see the point, and soon loses interest. Imagine; I'm willing to run around longer than my dog is!

So - we're trying a bit more training. Some reinforcement, to be sure, but also maybe a few new tricks. Maybe we'll try to harness that "Aussie crawl" on command!

And in the meantime, the game is afoot! I have taken to making every meal a hunt or a different food toy of some sort. Frozen kongs, a giant wobbly kong, a dispensing ball, a dispensing knobbly ball ... and tonight, a scavenger hunt. I closed Nicki in the kitchen and hid her entire dinner a few bits at a time throughout two main rooms. It kept her busy, gave her nose work to do, and kept her moving! It took her about 15 minutes to find everything. She kept looking for more after she'd found what I'd hidden, so there was even some residual exercise!

It's a challenge to keep a dog with limited responses busy and engaged while cooped up. Nonetheless, we're on it! If any of you have suggestions, we'd love to hear them!

Everyone Should Adopt A Rescue Dog / NOBODY Should Adopt A Rescue Dog

A new situation has shined a new light on our Nicki's inner thoughts. Her Dad was away on a business trip that lasted six days. At first she was totally fine. Dad hunts, so he's been away for a day or two before. This was different, and the certainty of her life became less solid. It showed.

When the Hubby is away, I use extra locks. For instance, I put the chain on the outer rear door. Of course the door can still be pulled open a bit, but it jerks to a stop with a loud noise and can't open any wider. Because I'm not used to using that chain that much, I tend to forget that it's hooked when I stumble to the door first thing in the morning. So, with only one eye open and Nicki clipped to her run lead, I pulled the door open. It abruptly stopped with a loud noise. Rather than scrambling away from the door, Nicki dropped to her belly and Marine-crawled her way through an opening that should have been too small for her! It didn't go smoothly. Nicki seemed desperate. She had to push her way through the barely-open door. I couldn't close the door to open it properly, because Nicki was wedged into the opening between the door and the frame. Eventually she squirmed through and ran off to the yard.

On the way back into the house, though, Nicki shoved herself past me and through a door I had only begun to open. Unlike the first time, this door wasn't stuck - but she pushed through anyway. Hmmm.

I forgot to unhook the chain one more time, and the same thing happened. It frightened me. The opening was so small - it looked like she could be hurting herself. Then I recognized this behavior for what it is: door-darting.

Nicki was a bit of a door-darter when she first came to us. Door darting is when a dog pushes past their humans to squeeze through a door as it's being opened. There are a ton of reasons for the behavior. Some dogs think it's a game. Some are over-excited to be outside. Some are actually trying to escape. I think Nicki's motivation is a combination of wanting to go outside in general and, in this instance, escape. The loud, jarring sound the door makes when yanked to a stop at the end of the door chain can be frightening to a reactive dog. Nicki has clearly been frightened in a number of ways - for a number of reasons. And, like many PTSD survivors, one trigger can send everything into reverse. That loud, jarring noise must have been a trigger for Nicki. She was in the area where the loud noise happened, and the only thought in her mind was to escape. Loud noises must have meant something really bad was about to happen, and she wanted no part of it.

So what do we do now? We start re-training against door darting. Nicki must sit with me between her and the door. Nicki must wait until the door is fully open. At each of those points, she gets a treat. Finally, when I give her the ok, she can go through the door. When she has done so, she gets another treat. While waiting for me to fully open the door, though, she cowers. She's uncertain about what's happening and why. I can't explain it to her. All I can do is patiently insist on the behaviors I need to see, and reward them when she complies.

That's why I say everybody/NOBODY should adopt a rescue dog. Having Nicki in our lives has taught me a huge amount about how dogs think and react, and how I must think and react in response. Raising a dog from puppyhood offers little of this insight. The dog grows up learning your languages; spoken, bodily, and otherwise. Little, if any, translation is needed. Every mindful dog lover would benefit from working with a rescued dog. The dogs have so much to teach us, and in so many ways.

Some dog owners, though, never really try to communicate with their dogs. These are the fools screaming "SHUT UP!" and "SIDDOWN!"at their hapless dogs. They haven't bothered to teach the dog anything, and yet they expect to command a behavior. They shouldn't adopt ANY dog - but they never recognize themselves. Instead they have tons of stories about their "stupid dog".

And finally, NOBODY should be able adopt a rescue dog, because in a perfect world, no dog would need rescue.

A Belated Anniversary Post

September 7th was Nicki's first anniversary with us, but we were too busy to write about it! Some people refer to their fur kids' adoption date as their "birthday", especially if they don't really know the real birthday. We don't. And we don't care. Life with Nicki began for us on September 7th, 2013, and no matter what we call it, it's a great day!

Nicki has made so much progress in this first year. We've learned so much about her, and from her. She's learned a great deal from us! This is one sharp little cookie. It always amazes me that she picked up on some things so quickly - almost automatically - without being formally taught. Two quick little hand claps means "time to get off Mom's lap/ Dad's lap/ the couch / the bed/ whatever." A light tap on the haunch means "please stop cleaning yourself so vigorously on the furniture!!" And Mom looking like she's about to sit down means "hurry up and jump before she actually lands!"

Recalls are, well, a work in progress. So is leash pulling. But we're working on those. The usuals (sit, lie down, wait, stay, off, stand) are down pat - but Nicki still needs to be in a cooperative mood. That happens more often these days.

But there are other, deeper, more wonderful signs of change. Nicki now allows most men to approach her, and even to pet her. When she first came to us, she was very fearful of men. The strength of her fearful reaction shocked and saddened me. She wasn't just hesitant; she was terrified. On many occasions, she'd pee submissively in fear. I've learned to stop myself from wondering what men had done to her before. There have been some signs (she's still fearful of loud, sudden noises, anything falling or being dropped in her vicinity, and feet being extended towards her in other than a normal walking step) but I don't really want to know. I can't go back, find these guys, and thrash the bejeezus out of them (although I'd love to) so I try to not allow myself to think about it. The best thing I can do for Nicki is to make her future so good that she eventually forgets her past completely.

Now, when I call to her and say "Nicki! Daddy's home!" she runs to the door to greet him! No more fearful pee, no more cowering. Many mornings, she'll crawl up in bed before the alarm goes off, kissing my husband's nose. And he loves it. He always thanks her for "such sweet kisses".

We go out in public without fear now. Nicki has learned to navigate the aisles at Bass Pro Shop, Runnings, and the new Field and Stream store. We usually spend 15 minutes when we first get in the door being greeted by every kid and dog lover in the place. And in those stores, there are plenty of both. Nicki takes it all in, sitting politely and enjoying the attention. It keeps happening as we move through the stores. She's always calm, stays close to me, and is neither fearful nor aggressive. If you want to know whether your dog is well socialized with people, hit up one of these stores! All will be revealed! And yes, I keep an eye on the kids. No sudden moves, thank them if they ask before petting, caution parents of tiny kids to keep the child in their arms. Nicki is smarter than a lot of parents we've met, that's for sure!

As far as socialization with other dogs, she's much less reactive. She's still not actually dog-friendly, but she no longer bark-warns other dogs for being too close for too long. That's at least partly due to me being more aware of her comfort zones in time and distance for contact. I know to help her keep distance and end the customary "checking of ID" before things get too close for comfort. Every time I get it right - which is most of the time now - Nicki comes away with a positive experience in meeting another dog.

It's amazing what a year of love, patience and consistency can do. That's the whole point of this blog. If you know of someone considering adopting a rescued dog, steer them here. I hope that reading our experiences will help to open a window on the adoption experience. Every situation is different, but some things are universal. Like how much ALL creatures need to be loved. Happy Anniversary, Nicki!